Q:
I go to church regularly, but I'm very shy so I never talk to anyone or try to make friends. I wish I wasn't this way. Why didn't God make me friendly and outgoing, like other people?
A:
We’re all different — from different faces to different personalities — and as I’ve sometimes said, the world would certainly be boring if we were all exactly alike! I don’t know why God made us this way, but He did, and He loves us in spite of our differences.
Instead of spending all your energy, therefore, wishing you were someone else, ask God to help you become the person He wants you to be. To put it another way, God doesn’t want you to remain withdrawn and friendless; not only will you hurt yourself, but you’ll also hurt others by never reaching out to help and encourage them. Instead, He wants to help you, little by little, to overcome your shyness and enjoy the company of others.
First, commit your life to Jesus Christ, asking Him to forgive your sins and come to live within you by His Spirit. Then ask Him to help you be less concerned about yourself, and more concerned about others and their needs. In addition, the next time you attend church, ask God to help you speak to just one person, even if it’s only a brief greeting or a comment about the service. Over time, you’ll find this comes naturally.
In addition, ask God to show you ways to help others through your church — volunteering in the nursery, for example, or visiting people in nursing homes. The Bible says, “The Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline” (2 Timothy 1:7).