Answers

Q:

Those psychologists I watch on TV say we need to have a healthy self-image but they never say how to get one -- at least not in a way that helps me. I admit I get down on myself and blame myself for everything, but what good would it do for me to just tell myself I'm not so bad after all?


A:

It probably wouldn’t do you any good — not if you were deceiving yourself into thinking you didn’t need to face your problems and do something about them. Self-deception isn’t the foundation for a healthy self-image.

I’m not a psychologist, of course — but it’s true that someone who’s constantly down on himself or herself is likely to feel unhappy and unfulfilled. And often our childhood experiences influence this. If our parents (for example) told us we were stupid and doomed to failure, then we’d probably grow up thinking it was true. This is one reason why parents need to watch what they say to their children, and constantly let them know they are loved.

It’s not always easy to overcome these feelings; a wise counselor may be helpful. But the real key, I’m convinced, is to begin seeing ourselves not through our own eyes or the eyes of others — but through God’s eyes. God made you — and you are valuable in His sight. You are so valuable that His Son was willing to give His life for you, so you could become part of God’s family forever.

Open your heart and life to Jesus Christ, and thank Him for His love for you. Then ask Him to help you meet your problems with His wisdom and strength. The Bible says, “May the Lord direct your hearts into God’s love” (2 Thessalonians 3:5).