Q:
My husband of 30 years has asked for a divorce now that our children are grown and gone. It seems we don't have a lot in common anymore and I think he is ready for a new life. Will I show him that I love him more by agreeing to this or should I pray that he will change his mind?
A:
From the writings of the Rev. Billy Graham
Today marriage vows have drastically changed, but for those who have been married a long time, most couples made the vow “until death us do part;” not “until divorce us do part.”
Tragically, marriages are falling apart at an unprecedented rate, and few even think about the vow they took before God when they sign the final papers declaring the marriage dead.
Love has been redefined by Hollywood and every other entertainment outlet as a way to satisfy physical desires and feelings. But the Bible defines love as it was meant to be—beautiful and loyal. Read 1 Corinthians 13, known as the great love chapter and learn how pleasing it is to love the way Christ commands.
Gardens don’t grow by themselves; they need to be tended and cultivated and weeded. The same is true of a marriage. A good marriage often consists of two good forgivers, and this is part of cultivating a strong relationship.
We must fight for our marriages through love, maturity and selflessness. Marriage has its difficult moments: personality differences, life’s pressures, misunderstandings, etc., but when two people are committed to one another and to God, He will give guidance and wisdom. He can reignite love. The Bible says, “A threefold cord is not quickly broken” (Ecclesiastes 4:12). Make Christ the center of your marriage.
Pray for the Lord to work in both hearts, with the remembrance of the vow that was taken early in the relationship.
(This column is based on the words and writings of the late Rev. Billy Graham.)