Q:

My wife and I are headed to the divorce court, and the main reason is because we're always arguing about money. I wish we'd known each other better before we got married, because we might have avoided all this. I don't have a question, but maybe you can warn young people to be more careful before they get married.

A:

I understand your concern; many young people, I’m afraid, do marry without really facing their differences or understanding the responsibilities that are involved in marriage.

But most of all, they enter marriage without seeking God’s will, or understanding that true love is more than physical attraction or emotional feelings. True love is a commitment—a decision to love each other not just when life is going well, but also when hard times come (as they will). It is a commitment to put the needs of our spouse first, and not just ourselves. The Bible says true love “is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs” (1 Corinthians 13:5).

And this is the kind of love I pray you and your wife will discover—for if you do, you can make a U-turn on the road to the divorce court. How is this possible? The first step is to commit your marriage—and your lives—to Jesus Christ. God loves you, and He does not want your marriage to fail. Put your marriage on a solid foundation by giving your lives to Christ.

Then ask God to help you deal with your problems over money. Ask Him to help you put His will first in your lives, instead of money and things. Then ask Him to help you take practical steps (such as a realistic budget) to bring your money under control.