Q:
Do you think people who've died and gone to heaven can look down and see what's going on in our lives? My mother and I had a rocky relationship, and frankly it makes me nervous to think she's still trying to run my life.
A:
Don’t worry; the only way your mother can keep running your life is if you let your memories of her control you. She no longer has any power to influence your life—not unless you let your resentment, or anger, or whatever other emotions you have left over from the past keep their hold on you.
The Bible doesn’t answer all our questions about heaven—although some Bible students believe that those who’ve already entered heaven can see what happens on earth. They cite passages such as Hebrews 12:1: “Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.”
But listen: Your mother is no longer the same person she once was! On this earth she was imperfect and flawed—as we all are. But in heaven all those imperfections are stripped away, and we will be like Christ. The Bible says, “Dear friends, now we are children of God, and what we will be has not yet been made known. But we know that when he (Christ) appears, we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is” (1 John 3:2).
Stop right now and thank God that your mother is in heaven. Then confess any anger or bitterness you still bear because of her, and ask Him to take it away. Most of all, make sure of your own relationship to Christ, and make it your goal to please Him.