Answers

Q:

My husband has a long-term medical condition, and I'm his only caregiver. I wish he'd understand how hard this is, especially when all he does is complain. He reads your column, so maybe you could say something about this.


A:

When we don’t feel well, it’s easy to become short-tempered and impatient. That doesn’t make it right, however, because what’s really happening is that we’re becoming concerned only about ourselves. But the Bible says, “Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others” (Philippians 2:4, ESV).

What can you do? First, pray for your husband. Pray not only that he’ll become more thoughtful and patient, but also that he’ll turn to God for daily strength. Pray, too, that each day he’ll turn to Christ and focus anew on the hope we have of heaven because of His death and resurrection. The Apostle Paul suffered much, and yet he also knew that because of Christ “our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all” (2 Corinthians 4:17).

Let me also encourage you and your husband to pray and read God’s Word together (perhaps from a book of daily devotions based on Scripture). If you’ve never done this before, one place to start could be pausing before each meal to thank God for His goodness and love.

Then ask God to help you. We all need rest; seek others who can assist you, even for only a few hours. Ask God also to give you an extra measure of understanding and patience, and a deep sense that you are doing His will. May the Psalmist’s experience become yours: “I delight to do thy will, O my God” (Psalm 40:8, KJV).