Q:
What's the best way to deal with difficult people? I know my sister hasn't had a very easy life, but the main reason is because she's so hard to get along with. She's coming to visit us in a few weeks, and I honestly dread it.
A:
We’ve all known difficult people (and to be honest, we may have been difficult ourselves from time to time!). And while we may be tempted to avoid people who are hard to get along with, it’s not always possible, nor does God want us to. Instead, He wants us to love others, even those who aren’t very lovable.
Why is this? One reason is because our love may actually change them for the better. Some people are difficult simply because they’re starved for attention, or because they’ve never really known what it is to be loved. They may even be filled with anger or bitterness. When this is the case, our love can have an impact on them. Our love can also point them to the greatest source of love, which is Christ.
What does this mean as far as your sister is concerned? First, pray for her, asking God not only to make her less difficult, but also to open her heart and mind to Jesus Christ. Then ask God to help you not react to whatever she says or does in anger or with sharp words. Instead, go out of your way to be kind to her, and to express an interest in what’s happening in her life.
In addition, be patient with her, and realize that sometimes people simply don’t change, in spite of our best efforts. The Bible wisely says, “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone” (Romans 12:18).
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