I appreciate your honesty, even if I can't agree with all your conclusions. Now I hope you will use your honesty in another way by honestly examining Jesus Christ and being willing to go wherever that examination takes you.
You see, the Bible makes a very startling claim. It tells us that God who created the whole world, including you and me has come down to this planet and shown Himself to us. He did this in a way that staggers our imagination: He became a man. This man (the Bible says) was Jesus Christ, who was both fully man and fully God. The Bible puts it this way: "In Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form" (Colossians 2:9). He proved this by rising from the dead.
Do you want to know what God is like? Don't look at human institutions or organizations; they are fallible, and sometimes they do things that are wrong. Instead, look honestly at Jesus Christ as He is found in the pages of the New Testament. When you do, you will discover not only that God exists, but also that He loves you and wants you to be part of His family forever.
God has promised, "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart" (Jeremiah 29:13). This will become true for you, as you open your heart and life to Christ.