I too hope your letter will keep someone who is reading it from doing the same thing you did. Satan will do everything he can to deceive us and make us think we can ignore God and live for ourselves but it simply isn't true.
I have often said in this column that one of life's hardest lessons is that we can't go back and change the past much as we'd like to. Decisions have consequences and when we make bad decisions, the results are inevitably bad. The Bible says, "Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man (or woman) reaps what he (or she) sows. The one who sows to please his (or her) sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction" (Galatians 6:7-8).
But the Bible tells us two other important truths I hope you will come to believe. First, no matter what we have done, God still loves us, and He wants to forgive us and make us part of His family. What you did in breaking your marriage vow was wrong, but God still will forgive you if you will turn to Jesus Christ in repentance and faith, and commit your life to Him.
Second, with Christ in your heart, your future can be different. He can rekindle your love for your husband, and He can give you a new joy and a new hope for the future. Don't let another day go by without Christ.