No, you aren't necessarily always going to be like this, because with God's help you can overcome this fear. And God wants you to overcome it, because one reason Jesus Christ came into the world was to "free those who all their lives were held in slavery by their fear of death" (Hebrews 2:15).
What happens to us during our childhood years often affects us very deeply, and sometimes those patterns of thinking aren't easy to overcome. But you have taken the first step by realizing this, and the key now is to replace those messages from the past with a new message—the message that Christ has conquered death and Hell and Satan. The Bible says God "has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves" (Colossians 1:13).
How did He do this? He did it by dying on the cross for our sins, and then conquering death by His resurrection. By the time you read this, Easter will be past—but never forget: Ours is an Easter faith, and we should celebrate Christ's victory over death every day!
Death is a reality, and the Bible says, "The last enemy to be destroyed is death" (1 Corinthians 15:26). But it will be destroyed! When feelings of fear threaten to rob you of your peace, answer them immediately with the truths of God's Word.