Let me reply to your question by asking you another question: Do you think God wants to forgive you? From what you say, I think you have talked yourself into believing that the answer to that question must be "No, He doesn't want to forgive me."
But this isn't true! If God didn't want to forgive you, He never would have sent His Son into the world to suffer and die on the cross for your sins. If He didn't want to forgive you, He never would have raised Jesus from the dead and taken Him back into heaven 40 days after His resurrection. And if He didn't want to forgive you, Jesus never would have said that He came "to seek and to save what was lost" (Luke 19:10).
But God does want to forgive you, because He loves you—and He did everything necessary to make your forgiveness possible by sending His Son into the world. You see, Jesus—who was without sin—took upon Himself every sin you have ever committed. He who was innocent became guilty, and He took upon Himself the punishment you deserve. This is why the Bible says that "he is able to save completely those who come to God through him, because he always lives to intercede for them" (Hebrews 7:25).
By a simple prayer of faith ask Christ to come into your life, and trust Him alone as your Savior. Then thank Him that He has truly forgiven your sins—all of them!