Elsewhere in your letter, you paint a picture of your life, caught up in what you believe to be a glamorous lifestyle -- hitting the latest clubs, traveling to exotic places, experimenting with alcohol and drugs, moving from one sexual encounter to another, etc.
These activities may convince you that you've found happiness. But have you really? Right now, it may seem so; the Bible even acknowledges that sin may have its pleasures "for a short time" (Hebrews 11:25). But some day, you're going to wake up and ask yourself, "Is this all there is to life?" And some day (if you don't destroy yourself first), boredom is going to overtake you. You'll find yourself saying with the writer of Ecclesiastes in the Bible, "All of it is meaningless, a chasing after the wind" (Ecclesiastes 2:17).
So far, you've deliberately left God out of your life, and you don't want anyone to tell you you're wrong. But I pray you will heed Jesus' warning about the dangers of ignoring God and going along with the crowd. He said, "Wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it" (Matthew 7:13).
God loves you (whether you believe it or not); if He didn't, He wouldn't care whether or not you end up destroying yourself. But He does care -- and the proof is that He sent His Son, Jesus Christ, into the world to save you from sin's penalty. Don't be deceived, but discover true joy and security by giving your life to Jesus Christ.